i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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