I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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