Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
vagina is talking i cant
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize