i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
