my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize