So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
