I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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