Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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