Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
