Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
