I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize