I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
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You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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