whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
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