i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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