please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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