I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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