My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
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He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
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I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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