Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
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