she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
