Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize