end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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