what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Who put my cat in the fridge?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
