I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
