I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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