You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
nutella sex= disaster
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire