Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.