he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.