my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision