More tranny stories later!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
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Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
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Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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