I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
