I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
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But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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