Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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