she was so not down for the gang bang
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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