I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize