what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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