If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I FOUND THE LEGS
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
