Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
His hands were made for my vagina.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
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