Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize