is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
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