So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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