singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize