the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize