I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize
