some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Randomize