Your tits are I can't wait for
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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