Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
