Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
