I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
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Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
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I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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