ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
