I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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