Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Randomize