kristin has been a bad kristin
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
the condom got lost in my hair
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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